Been thinking much too hard lately.
For this post (to get back into the swing of things), I shall post something I wrote on the 3rd day of the very New Year, straight out of my Moleskine Journal (which I carry everywhere).
5:57 AM: Woke up in a start. Going to be late for work.
6:03 AM: Leave house in a hurry. Pant legs are barely on...going to be late for work. Oh wait...already am late for work.
6:09 AM: Arrive at work. When driving at regulation speed limit, it normally takes 15 minutes to get from my house to here. Man, was I speeding.
6:10 AM: Clock in.
6:47 AM: First customer of the morning.
6:52 AM: An older Hispanic man wearing a Trucker Hat and missing his two front teeth, and the rest were stained yellow from Coffee and chewing Tobacco tells me that I look like a Princess. I think to myself
maybe I should get ready in 45 seconds more often...7:12 AM: Woman buys English Muffins at a total of $3.69. She takes 5 minutes to get $4 out of her wallet. I giggle at the sheer ridiculous-ity.
7:17 AM: Indian man who must weigh at least 300 pounds and a girth comparable to that of a life-sized teddy bear asks if he could use the electric shopping cart, and if it works. I nod, while biting down on my lower lip. This is a very common facial expression of mine.
7:18 AM: The woman who was fishing for $4 out of her purse finally pays. She admits to me that her New Years Resolution is to lose weight...again. She openly wonders if she will stick through with the commitment this year. Don't we all?
7:31 AM: Man with a beautiful accent comes through my line. Was it New Zealand? Irish? Scottish? British? Swedish? I don't know. I think it's a South African accent, now that I think about it. In fact, I'm now 100% positive that it is South African. In any case, he bought an LA Times newspaper, and I looked at the cover photograph, and couldn't help but burn up in bitter envy at the photographer who had such a place of power that I coveted so greatly.
7:36 AM: I spot 2 little children in their soccer uniforms with their Dad. I sigh at the sight, because it reminds me so much of when I was that age. I smile at the little girl and she she smiles back. She has dimples, and in a certain light, I could see her beige freckles that blended in so softly and lightly with her ivory skin.
7:40 AM: Fresh batch of rotisserie chicken out of the oven. I can smell the rosemary seasoning. I kind of miss the taste of meat. I haven't had breakfast yet. UGH. This delectable smell is enough to make me break my Vegetarianism.
7:47 AM: I forget the code for bagels. I stand there like an idiot, voiding off code after code of the wrong item. I finally get it right. The boy my age laughs it off; but I realize that if I had another customer who was a little bit older, I would have been greeted by impatient eyes and a hollow tap being made by stalky legs sprinkled with little twists of brown hair, tube socks and reeboks on the linoleum floor.
7:50 AM: The fluorescent lighting in the store is making me cringe. I want to be outside.
7:52 AM: Man comes through my line with a newsboy hat. I can't help but think 1940's. He claims it's better that I have the early morning shift. I agree. But in my head, all I'm thinking about is my warm bed back at home, which was currently being uninhabited.
7:56 AM: I itch my chin.
7:58 AM: I realize the only reason why I'm doing this is to pass the time. I wish I wrote more. I wish a lot of things.
7:59 AM: A man buys a lighter. He tries to give me change after I entered it into the register. My mind can't calculate the change to give back to him. I laugh and he says nevermind. I can't help but think that if this had happened later in the day, I would have been able to give him the right amount. I get tired of thinking about it, and shrug it off.
8:01 AM: Cathy walks in.
8:05 AM: Jimmy calls me his Butterfly. I smile. A new nickname everyday. Cute :)
8:11 AM: A super-cute hipster boy with thick rimmed glasses comes through my line. I smile at his beard that he's obviously trying to grow. I think to myself that he looks a lot like a Keith Murray (We Are Scientists) mixed with a Dave Macklovich (Chromeo). I keep on looking at him, and can't help but really fall for his irresistible charm and nonchalant demeanor. He scratches at his scruff and tells me how much he would like some truffles right now. I wish I could have asked which ones he meant: the chocolate kind or...the fungi kind.
8:12 AM: I wish I could join that hipster boy for some truffles someday.
8:16 AM: A funny Hawaiian-looking woman comes through my line. The big mole on her cheek makes her look like she belongs as a character in Loony Toons.
8:21 AM: Cathy tells me that the man that comes in at 2AM to clean the floors of the store was killed in a car accident today. I never met him. I'm stricken with grief, and I start to wonder about his family, or how his wife is, or what his children were thinking at this exact moment in time. I flash back to my own memories of that dreaded day, but after several minutes of playing that day back and forth in my head like a movie, I make myself stop because I really should be sending my condolences to his family, not feeling sorry for my own troubles.
8:34 AM: A lady comes through with her order. Her check is declined, and I give her a reassuring smile with as much sympathy that I could muster without looking too depressed. I pretended like it had happened all the time to the majority of customers (which is somewhat true: it being the Holiday Seasons...many people have overspent on their budgets). She left without paying, claiming that she'd be back. I felt her pain. I too, am suffering financially. And perhaps that's why I felt so bad.
8:48 AM: The store is steadily getting busier. A young black woman (she's gorgeous, so SO gorgeous) complains about the florist not helping her get cigarettes, even when she was standing right behind the counter. I'm taken aback by the blatant lack of customer service and rudeness from Michelle (florist). I apologize on her behalf. The young lady smiles at me and says that I'm a doll for being so polite. I give her the Benson & Hedges Ultra Light Menthol 100's and she leaves, shaking her finger in the air to the beat of "Respect" by Aretha Franklin, as it was playing on the Store Radio Station.
8:55 AM: 5 minutes till lunchtime.
9:00 AM: LUNCHTIME!
11:51 AM: First time I feel pity for Sam at work. She's still a pitiful mess, though.
12:23 PM: Cute little asian boy with a rabbit eared hooded sweatshirt on. He holds a wooden block with colored letters engraved on it. He nibbles the corner and looks up at me through his tousled hair. If I only had my camera...
12: 31 PM: That lady still hasn't come back for her groceries.
